i feel like eore today.

January 31, 2008 at 7:03 pm 2 comments

Another failed cycle. Ugh. I’m feeling really beaten down by the repetitiveness of this monthly misery. We are coming up on two years of this, without a single BFP, at the end of February. So I think the time has come to explore having a diagnostic laparascopy. I believe I do suffer from endo to some degree because I have extreme period pain and not always with my cycle. It radiates down to the “back end” (sorry) and I end up taking some pretty strong painkillers to get through the first three days of menstration. It’s getting worse and worse too. Plus, I still get pain at my c-section incision site – leading my research in Dr Google to believe I may have some scar adhesions which could be causing a problem conceiving. A laparoscopy is the only way to find out if this is the case. I’m scared to do it, but what other options do I have at this point? Face the fear, my friends. That’s what my therapist always told me. So I’m making an appt with my OB/GYN to discuss all this. I saw him about 6 months into TTC #2 and he was the one who put me on the 3 months of clomid and then sent me to the fertility specialist. He also saved my life and Sweetlove’s life during my pregnancy and he performed the c-section. I’m not sure how much lap work he does, but I’m confident he’ll refer me to someone skilled if he’s not the right guy. I fear general anesthetic. I came out of the general with my c-section in a panic and not being able to breathe so they had to put me back under, it was an awful experience.

And there’s no way I’m going back to the RE I saw last year for the treatments. He was just not on his game, in my opinion. He gave me inaccurate answers to my questions and I never had a lot of faith in him. Then when my period left on a 99 day hiatus after the injectibles cycle he told me it was because I’m fat not because of the effects of the drugs. What a coincidence when my period returned, I had regular cycles again. Jerk. Oh, and he told me I should lose weight because a pregnancy could be dangerous – umm, so how come you treated me TO GET PREGNANT for numerous cycles and it was OK when things were making sense but when a rock hits the spoke, it’s now my weight’s fault and I shouldn’t get pregnant ??? So why’d you treat me to begin with? Ugh. Not all doctors are created equal.

So anyway, back to my trusted OB/GYN and hopefully a lap, and then maybe we’ll have better luck. IF sucks.

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Entry filed under: Uncategorized.

snow day there are no words

2 Comments Add your own

  • 1. Alisha  |  February 1, 2008 at 1:45 pm

    Well this news totally sucks!
    Hopefully you will get the answers you are looking for after having this test. And with the answers, hopefully the solution will follow.

  • 2. surefoott  |  February 4, 2008 at 7:25 pm

    I think you should definitely push for a laparoscopy. This test may very well render a solution. If you keep your end goal in mind, you can do it!!! I just know you can!!! Keep your eye on the prize – it is going to happen for you. One more test may just be the one.

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