4dpiui

May 20, 2007 at 10:21 pm 3 comments

I have been cramping on and off for the past four days. It’s getting a little worrisome. I’m not sure if it’s a bad sign or a good sign, but damn, it’s annoying. I can’t walk around for any period of time, my stomach feels like it’s in knots. I’m trying not to overthink all the what if’s of this cycle. The prometrium (vag. suppositories) are sending me into PMS overdrive. Cranky, sad, easily irritated, sore back, sore bb’s, tired… omg, and I have 10 more days of this getting increasingly worse. Why do I do this to myself? ……… oh right…… for a baby. If I think too long about what I’ve been through over the past six months especially, I get really angry, so I try not to focus on it. I try to focus on what I do have. That sometimes works, and sometimes doesn’t to be honest.

I have a follow-up appt with the RE on June 4th to discuss this cycle’s outcome and going forward. I am not sure what I want to do next. I’m thinking it might be a good idea to take a cycle off to let my body rest. Maybe take a round of BCP to try to get rid of the cyst? I guess we’ll see what the doc thinks. Look at me, already planning the failure of this cycle. It’s a defense mechanism, I’m sure.

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3 Comments Add your own

  • 1. Sunny Jenny  |  May 21, 2007 at 12:00 am

    It’s okay to be doubtful. I find that preparing myself for the worst outcome helps me make it through. I do love a plan.

  • 2. Mary Ellen  |  May 21, 2007 at 1:03 pm

    I always prepare for the worst. I would much rather be plesantly surprised than end up with an unexpected blow.

  • 3. Alisha  |  May 21, 2007 at 3:15 pm

    I would be doing the same thing you’re doing. It would be harder to live with the disappointment so you live in the negative, rather than the positive. This way if it does fail you don’t and won’t fall as hard. I really hope that you get your wish soon baby cakes!! I pray hard for that to happen for you and your little family 🙂

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