Lackluster

January 6, 2007 at 5:46 am Leave a comment

I thought maybe once the distractions of the holidays were passed and we were into a new year, my vigor for my job would reappear. Unfortunately that is not the case. I have gone to work this past week, each day dreading the eight hours and watching the clock for when it is time to escape. I am good at my job, I enjoy it, my coworkers are wonderful. I used to get so into my projects that I would barely come up for air in a day. But lately, as the months go on, BFN after BFN, my mind is just not there. My mind is on babies, and the lackthereof in my belly and in my nursery. What is wrong with me, I keep thinking to myself. I was able to do this once with no trouble at all, why is it so different now. The big “one year” date is looming and the closer it gets, the more anxiety I feel about all of this. Where we might be in another year. Will we still be here, in this place, finding ways to cope with the dreaded AF arrival? I don’t know. I used to be able to escape into my work and leave all of this at home. But now it seems it follows me there, and I am online reading forums, studies, research, all day long, searching for the “answer”, the next tip, the miracle treatment I can try that doesn’t involve thousands of dollars and lots of medical risk.

So I booked my first acupuncture appointment today, for next Tuesday. There is a clinic here in Van.couv.er that specializes in fertility acupuncture and traditional chin.ese medicine. It’s something I had in the back of my mind that I would eventually try but was hoping not to have to go there. It’s something I just don’t know a lot about, and maybe don’t quite understand. So I’ll go, find out if it rings true for me, see how it goes. They suggest once weekly treatments for three months. I am hoping it can cure my “late ovulation” problems. There is obviously SOMETHING out of balance in my body, and clomid certainly isn’t resolving this. Vitamins weren’t able to resolve it. Diet didn’t seem to help either. Maybe this? So I’ll let you all know how it goes. Does anyone have experience with acupuncture for fertility? I’d love to hear some experiences and whether it was helpful or not.

Now I’m off to try to come up with some fun things to do with an almost-three-year-old on a cold rainy weekend that will have to be indoors but burn some much needed steam.

Have a great weekend everyone!

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Entry filed under: Uncategorized.

A New Year One Step Forward, Two Steps Back

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